Insomnia and Shkoffing

So it's 4:45 in the morning and I haven't been able to sleep. This has been happening quite a lot since I've had the surgery but I'm not sure if it's related. I just know that right now I'd love to sleep, but it won't come.

I saw my nutritionist on Monday who put me back on solid food. I told her I felt like I was being snipped from the umbilical cord and thrown out into the world naked! I need guidance!! She just looked at me and said, you know what to do and then suggested I start B-12 vitamins for energy. I sure could use some energy right now. Ever since this surgery I've been so tired, I can't get up in the morning. I have to pry myself out of bed so maybe the B-12 will help. I hope.

I need to watch my intake of carbs, especially bread, and if I do eat bread, it's better toasted because it'll go down easier and my new tummy will be able to handle it better. I like toast so that's okay with me. I made cube steaks the other night and took the smallest piece with about 4-5 cubes of potato. I ate half of the steak which I'm assuming was about 3 ounces and 2-3 pieces of potato and I was done. So far I've been doing great, tonight I had about 2 ounces of chicken salad on a low carb tortilla and I was happy. Now, with the small amount of food that I have to eat, why the fuck does not weight not come off faster? I eat anywhere from 500-700 calories a day, that is so beyond normal but again, the scale doesn't go up and it doesn't go down. Ah, I guess if I was in my mid 20's again, it would be spiraling down faster than a speeding train, but being in my 50's makes it suck all the more.

Anyway, I need to invest in a camera because I've been experimenting with food, and would like to take some pics to show you. Tonight I made a dessert. I don't have a name for it and it's probably been invented already so I'm not claiming genius status here. So here it is, if you're interested:

1 cup of part skim ricotta cheese
1/2 c. of greek yogurt
Dash of vanilla extract
1/2 tsp. Saigon cinnamon
1 package of Stevia

Mix it all up till smooth. Done.

I shkoffed down about a 1/2 cup. Oh, I'm sorry, I can't schkoff anymore, so I ate it slowly giving the dessert time to send that signal to my brain saying, "hey shithead, enough!"
It has about 25 grams of protein for the entire recipe and maybe 180 calories, and it makes about 3 servings. I think.

It's 5:06 am, I think I should shut down my computer and try to sleep.

g'night!
Nica