Sweet, Sweet Victories!

When I started this blog I was about a month post op and still wearing my fat girl pants which were size 22 stretch jeans and regular stretch pants. I have a lot of friends who are happy for me, especially my friend Linda took issue with me still wearing my old clothes and pulled me aside. She told me she was sick of watching me hike up my pants to just about under my boobs just to see them fall past my hips. Only a good friend will tell you like it is! Linda was right, it was indeed time for me to give up my fat clothes and buy some new clothes, so we went on a shopping excursion to Lane Bryant one evening.

While in the store, I found some pants that I thought would look good in one size smaller than what I usually wear. Linda, on the other hand grabbed pants in even smaller sizes. I went into the dressing room where the sales person had already designated a dressing room for me and had the clothing hanging on hooks inside.

I tried on a size 20 boot cut pant. Too big. I tried on a size 18. Still too big. I'm thinking holy shit the sizes must run big in this store. Linda handed me a size 16 pant. In my mind, I prepared myself to squeeze into them and not be able to get them past my hips.

HOLY SHIT!

I put them on, buttoned and zipped them without having to suck my gut in and then looked at myself in the mirror. I could think of nothing else other than I just put my fat ass into a size 16 pants! my next thought was where did the other half of me go?? I was looking dead into reality and it was very kind to me!!

It's hard for me to explain how I really feel about all this because after years of squeezing my big ass into clothes that were increasing in size and trying to look like someone I was clearly not, I looked in that mirror and actually liked myself and liked what I saw! I couldn't take my eyes off my reflection in the mirror. It's not like I don't have any mirrors at home, but it felt as if I was looking at myself for the first time in years! I went from having 3 chins to one chin, from having chipmunk cheeks and looking like I was constantly hoarding nuts to actually seeing my cheekbones, from having a stomach that made me look like I was going to give birth to quadruplets to almost flat, my hips and thighs were smaller, I HAD A FREAKIN' WAIST!!! And even though it was smaller, my ghetto bootie was still there!!

It was hard for me initially to believe the person that I was looking at in the mirror was me and I was not dreaming!

I bought the size 16 pants and a size 14, not size 22 shirt to go with it. I even went back and bought another pair of pants and a pair of jeans and a few more shirts, all on sale of course. I have enough clothes now to make it through the end of summer, and I'll evaluate what's in my closet for the upcoming fall and winter.

People are noticing my weight loss now than ever before. I'm not liking the attention very much because I don't know how to take a compliment, but please know deep down inside I'm grinning from ear to ear.

Yesterday morning I reached my 50 pound goal and set my next 50 pound goal that I hope to achieve by my surgery anniversary on February 22nd. This morning I lost another pound!

This morning I also tried on a bra that I once said I'd never get into and it fit. Comfortably. In fact, the cups are a little roomy, but the bra didn't dig into my skin anywhere. With that, I went through my bra drawer and pulled out about 15 bras that no longer fit me that I'm giving to charity. Almost all of them are new. I've gone from a double D to a C and now possibly a B.

Life is getting better.

a la prossima!

Change is Good!

When my stall was nearing its 6-week mark, I not only became very sad and frustrated, it wasn't supposed to work this way, I was supposed to lose have a stall here and there but not one that is lasting 6 weeks and counting! so, my first thought was it probably isn't a stall and my second thought was, it's definitely what I'm eating. I work out every other day, I do water aerobics twice a week and still the weight didn't go up, BUT, it didn't go down either. Well, after having a discussion about this over lunch with a very dear friend, I made up my mind on what to do.

I joined Weight Watchers online.

I'm not writing this to sing the praises of Weight Watchers because the program isn't designed for post op bariatric patients but I am going to say that I figured out what I was doing wrong. I was definitely eating too many calories - lots of protein, low carb and all but way too many calories and, I know some of you will hate me for saying this, but, I've had to put a few grainy carbs back into my eating plan just to kickstart the weight loss again. By adding a few carbs I mean, I eat a small piece of whole grain toast in the morning, that's it! I'm also keeping track of what I eat, still keeping my protein grams to 60/70 per day and I stay below my points guideline. I couldn't possible eat 28 points a day, but 21-24 is working for me. I can't even eat the extra points alloted to do with what you will for the week or the extra points rewarded for working out. My stomach just isn't big enough anymore to stuff those extra points in, so I don't use them. I'm told if I don't use them, my body will go into starvation mode... mmmm... I don't think so. I'm eating, eating right and eating healthy.

So after 2 weeks of WW tracking of food intake and activity, I've managed to lose 3 1/2 pounds. I don't know if it's the carbs my body is seeing after so many months, or it's the lower caloric intake, but whatever it is, it's working, my mental slump is better and I'm feeling great!

As many of you know, there is nothing more frustrating than hitting a stall, and I expect stalls to last several weeks, but 6 weeks is a bit much in my opinion, and it is a reason to figure out what the underlying problem is. Everyone's body reacts differently, apparently my body punishes me for eating the way most post op bariatric patients eat, so at this moment the WW plan is working for me.

In the end though, does it really matter? We are all trying to achieve the same goal which is the reason we had weight loss surgery to begin with. As long as we're losing in a healthy way.

I'll take a 3.5 loss any day! Yup, change can be very good!



A la prossima!